Okay, so here is my dilemma. I have been serving as a "youth coordinator" at my local church. I'm not going to say where or the denomination. Anyway, I have come to know and become fond of two girls, cousins, both eleven years old. One is blonde and the other is brunette. They both took a shine to me, as even though I'm 36, I still act like a kid a lot of the time (assburgers? adhd? who knows?!).
So anyway, the blonde one was there one weekday this past week, which is unusual and I happened to be there as well, which is not so unusual.
I was using the wifi at the church (yes, christfags believe in internet) and Blonde came in and asked what I was doing.
Well I quickly closed the porn tabs before she could get over to me and I had an innocuous Youtube page on the screen. Just the front page, because I hadn't been looking at youtube, I had been looking at porn.
I started bullshitting her about looking for music videos and then I realized that the little google search box up there on the right hand corner of my firefox still had "tiny tits" in it from where I had been searching.
Blonde just read it out loud. "Tiny tits?" She kinda laughed. I glanced over at her and saw as she glanced down at her own chest.
Her face turned red. And my face felt hot, which means mine was probably red too.
"Why does that say 'tiny tits'?" she asked, and she sounded like she was kind of swallowing a lump in her throat or something when she asked that.
I swallowed a lump or something myself before I could find my voice.
"Um, I don't know..." was the best I could muster.
"Oh..." she replied, still staring at the screen.
I didn't know how much she knew about Firefox or the Google search box, or whatever, so I didn't really know if she knew that I had been searching for that or not.
Sorry for the F5ers, but I'm typing this as I go. Anyway, there was this awkward silence for what was probably 20 seconds, but felt like 5 hours. I was wondering where Blonde's mom was and then, right on cue, she popped her head in.
"Hey Ted," she said. (Not my real name of course.)
"Hey Blonde's Mom," I replied.
"I need to go pick up my mom real quick. Do you mind of Blonde hangs out here with you for a few minutes?"
"Not at all. That's cool."
It says something that she trusts me like this. I've been Youth Coordinator (wtfever that means) there for 2 years now, and haven't molested anyone yet, so I guess that's why.
Just to be clear, but Blonde's Mom was indeed picking up her own mom. That would be Blonde's Grandmother.
Anyway, Blonde sat down next to me and proceeded to study the screen while I looked for videos for innocent stuff like Owl City.
It was funny, because she had never even heard of Owl City, yet if you're a Youtube Loli Trawler, then you know that many many girls of that age dance (and sometimes scantily clad! :3 ) to Fireflies by Owl City.
Anyway, she seemed bored with the Fireflies video, so I figured Miley Cyrus would win, and sure enough she started singing along to Party in the USA.
So Miley is dancing and singing "throw my hands up, they're playing my song, the butterflies fly away," etc, and Blonde is singing along, and of course I'm starting to hum along because I know the song from so many Youtube lolis, and we're both just kinda singing and smiling and the awkwardness seems to have passed.
Then the song is over, and Blonde turns to me and says "Do you think Miley is pretty?"
And I say, "Sure, but not as pretty as you."
And there it was, before I could even censor my thoughts. And Blonde smiles and blushes, and I'm sure I'm blushing now because I've just told this hot little 11yo that she's prettier than Miley Cyrus.
And make no mistake, she is.
I'm not even into blondes, as a general rule. But this one has tickled my fancy and my funnyboner since I first laid eyes on her.
Anyway, Blonde dropped the next bombshell:
"So, you think tiny tits are pretty?"
I felt my heart sink, not necessarily in a bad way, but not necessarily in a good way either. I felt hot and cold at the same time. I didn't know what I could say that wouldn't get me in trouble, but I knew I could probably be fairly candid with her.
See, this girl and I (and Brunette of course) have played like kids for the last couple of years, and as they have started to develop into young women, we have been playing that way less, but there's still that connection, you know?
I'm trying to be as objective as possible, because I don't want to fall into the trap of "she's in love with me! hurrr" just because she looks up to me, which is what a lot of pedos do (I think, but who knows? Maybe I have no clue what I'm talking about.)
So anyway, I'm thinking what to say, and I just say "fuck it" (not out loud of course) and say (out loud) "Yes, I think they're hot. I think you're hot."
And part of me is hoping that this creeps her out so that she thinks I'm coming on too strong and she decides not to go down this road, and that saves me from making a big mistake.
Anyway, her face was really red at this point, and she smiled again, and she was like, "Well, I still wish they were bigger."
"Why?" I asked.
"Because," she said, "guys want girls with big boobs."
"Not all guys," I countered. As the conversation was thundering along like a train ready to derail, I was oddly getting more comfortable with it.
"Yeah, but most guys."
"Well look," I said, "you're still eleven. I mean, you're not done growing. You know?"
"Yeah, that's true," she said. "I haven't had puberty yet."
I loved the way she said "had" instead of "hit". I found it endearing somehow.
"Okay, so I know that it seems like a long time, but in a few years, you'll probably have bigger ones."
"I just wish they'd get here sooner," she said, looking down at them again, and she pulled her shirt tighter, and oh how I wish she wasn't wearing a padded bra when she did that.
Yes, I could tell it was padded. You look at enough women and girls' chests and you learn how to tell.
Then she looked at me with a serious expression on her face.
"Is it true that if you let someone play with your boobs they'll grow faster?"
At that moment, a plan began to form in my mind. Yeah, I think you know where this is going.
"Um, well, it might be," I said. I didn't know how I was going to approach this, but I think you guys know what I was planning by now.
"Cuz my friend said that it worked. She let her boyfriend play with hers and they got bigger a week later."
Now anyone with even a basic half-assed understanding of human biology knows that playing with a girl's boobs does not make them get any bigger any faster. But when a girl gets felt up and then has a growth spurt, it's a logical "Post hoc, ergo proctor hoc" conclusion to reach.
"Well, I know that the massaging of the breasts probably helps but there's usually more to it than that."
Yeah, I started using big words like "massaging of the breasts" as opposed to "playing with your boobs" so she'd think I was being totally serious.
The wheels in my head were spinning madly as my plan took shape. Meanwhile, Blonde just cocked her head and looked at me as if waiting for me to explain.
"See, what happens to make your boobs grow normally is, your body releases hormones."
"Like estrogen," she added.
"Right. When you're... developing..." (I felt weird saying that word, while lookign at her.) "your body releases these hormones and certain parts of your body respond. That's part of growing up."
"I know all that," she said.
"Okay. So what if I told you I knew a way to speed up the process. Make you start to grow much sooner."
"Yeah?" she responded, her eyes lighting up. And I was starting to feel just the least bit guilty, but the hammering in my chest and the throbbing in my pants obliterated any sense of guilt that might have stopped me.
"Okay, you know what happens when a girl gets pregnant?"
"Uh, yeah," she said, as if I was starting to lose her, "she has a baby."
Anyway, I asked Blonde, "What else happens?"
She thought for a moment, then said, "Her boobs get bigger? Because they're full of milk."
"Right. Now, what if I told you that I knew how to make a girl's boobs get bigger without getting pregnant, and without them being full of milk, but still do it through the same process?"
"Um, I'd want to know how."
"Okay," I said. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and began to explain.
"First off, do you trust me?"
"Yeah," she said, maybe a little too quickly.
"I really like you, and I'll be willing to do this for you, but you have to promise not to tell anyone, or we could both get in a lot of trouble."
Yeah, her in trouble, not so much, but I wanted to hedge my bets.
"Okay," she said.
"Okay," I replied. "Now, here's how I'll do it, and this is only if you want me to, and if you don't think it's gross."
"Gross?" she said, and she looked a little worried.
"Yeah, you might think it's gross."
Now, this last was to get her in the right frame of mind. See, Blonde is a bit of a tomboy. She might not eat things off the floor normally, but if you drop something on the floor and
>imply that she won't eat it
she'll pick that shit up off the floor and eat it just to prove you wrong.
I once saw her pick up a dead cockroach that even I was too pussy to touch one time, just because I told her I didn't think she would, and that it was probably "too gross".
"Just tell me," she said, her cute little face seeming to be just a bit impatient.
"Okay," I said, still hesitating, but now just to make her think I was having second thoughts, "if you really want to know."
"Yes!" she said, just a bit loudly.
"Okay, you know how a woman gets pregnant, right? I mean, you know what the stuff is that gets her pregnant."
I expected her face to twist up at the idea, but surprisingly she just said, matter of factly, "sperm."
"Right. Okay, so if the sperm gets inside you, then you get pregnant. But what if the sperm stays on the outside?"
She began to look a little worried.
"You mean, like on my boobs, right?"
Damn she was a quick study!
"Yeah. But like I said, it's probably too gross for you to even think about. Sperm is sticky and it's easy enough to wipe off, but you probably don't want it on you. Besides, I think you look just fine with your boobs the way they are." I was giving her the biggest, most wide open out I could.
"Um, okay," she mumbled. Now I was regretting that I gave her that much of an out.
"I mean, I can do it for you if you really want me to," I said, reminding her that I was still up for it.
Quite literally by now.
"Would you really want to?" she asked meekly.
"Of course! If it would make you happy."
She stared at the floor for awhile. I knew the clock was ticking. We'd already eaten up I didn't know how many minutes. Still, things were going surprisingly better than I could have hoped.
She looked at me sheepishly. "You promise you won't tell anyone?" she asked.
HA! ME tell anyone?!
"Of course not," I said. I reached over and stroked the side of her face, the first time I had ever touched her like that aside from family-type hugs. "This is just between you and me. Also, you have to promise not to tell anyone either."
"Pinky swear!" she said holding out her pinky, curled and ready to interlock with mine.
"Pinky swear!" I said gleefully.
"Okay, this is gonna have to be quick, before your mom gets back. I don't think she'd be real happy with this."
"What should I do?" she asked.
"Well, I'm going to... uh... massage them. So, I'll need you to take off your shirt and your bra."
She started to blush again.
"You don't have to do this if you don't want to," I said.
"I know," she said, still looking at the floor. Already, she was reaching down to pull her shirt up.
Soon her shirt was off and only her white padded bra was covering her delicious loli mounds.
"Here come my tiny tits!" she announced nervously. Her false bravado was so charming.
And then the bra was off. Her two little points were standing straight out, the little pink puffy nipples ready to receive my "treatment".
I reached out one hand, ready to stroke them. I was about to bust in my pants already.
"Are you sure?" I asked one last time.
"Yeah," she responded.
Before she could change her mind, I began gently stroking her little tits. Oh they were so wonderful to touch, so soft and yielding, just barely half a handful each.
"It'll help if I suck on them first, to stimulate the blood flow. Is that okay?"
She already had a kind of dazed look on her face.
"Okay," she said slowly.
I suckled first one little tit, then the other, tenderly as I could, but still aware of the little Jack Bauer in the back of my mind screaming "WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME!"
I could hear her breathing start to get raspy. I could only assume that she was enjoying this and had never experienced anything like it before. I stopped my sucking and took a moment to look at her face. Her eyes were closed and her lips were parted. I so desperately wanted to kiss her just then. She opened her eyes and gazed into mine, her lips still parted. She still seemed a bit stunned.
"Did that feel good?" I asked her.
"Yeah, it did," she replied, as if surprised by her own answer.
"They're so nice just like they are," I said softly as I still stroked them. "Are you sure you want them to be bigger?"
"Yeah," she replied. I lamented the fact that she thought they needed to be bigger. Wouldn't they grow soon enough? Still, I was ready to get off, and I was not going to waste this opportunity.
"Okay, I'm going to take out my penis. And I'm going to use it to put the sperm on your boobs. Are you sure you want me to do this?"
"Yeah, I guess so," she said.
I stood up and she remained seated. I unzipped my fly and pulled my pants and my boxers down. My dick was already rock hard. Blonde just stared at it.
"Now, it's not like peeing. I have to work to make it come out."
"You mean like masturbating," she said, matter-of-factly.
"Yeah," I answered, not sure whether I should be pleased or worried that she knew about that.
I reached out and played with her tits again as I cranked my dick. It didn't take long at all before I blew my load. I put my dick against her chest and came all over her tits.
"Wow," she said, seeming a bit stunned by what had just happened.
I started massaging her tits again, rubbing my jizz all over them.
"It needs to soak into your skin, like lotion," I informed her. I kept rubbing it around on her little tits until it started to dry up.
"Smells kinda funny," she remarked.
"Well, we can wipe off what's left then."
She grabbed her shirt and bra and we walked to the nearest bathroom. I wetted a paper towel and wiped her chest. Already, playing with those little tits again was making my dick hard once more.
I grabbed another paper towel and dried off her chest. The way those little points barely jiggled was incredibly sexy.
She looked down at them, still holding her shirt and bra in her hand.
"So, when will they start to grow?"
Just then we heard a door open nearby. I knew it was her mom.
"Bathroom!" I whispered to her. Understanding, she darted through the bathroom door. Quietly as I could, I quickly made my way back to the office. It was between me and the door that Blonde's mom was coming in. I wasn't going to make it, so I stopped at the water cooler in the hall instead, and began filling a paper cup. Blonde's mom appeared from around the corner.
"Hey," I greeted, trying not to shake and spill the water.
"Hey, where's Blonde?"
"Bathroom," I replied.
I heard a toilet flush and then Blonde came out of the bathroom, looking guilty as hell. I wondered if my face showed guilt as well.
"Ready to go?" Blonde's mom asked.
"Yeah. Lemme grab my coat."
She ran back to the office while I sipped my water, just casually glancing at nothing, trying not to look as guilty as I felt.
Shortly, Blonde returned.
"See ya Sunday!" she said, as they left.
I breathed a sigh of relief. There was no telling now what might happen. I have crossed a line here, and I don't know if I want to keep going down this road or not.
What road? Let me explain.
When I went back to the office where Blonde had just been, I noticed my laptop's screen was down. I hadn't left it like that.
Upon opening it, I found a small scrap of paper on the keyboard. It had one word:
My dilemma is this: Should I?